Posts Tagged ‘communications’

Thinking Listening Strengths

Friday, April 6th, 2012

?I can look at it clearly, without emotion.?

What I like about talking to Thinking types is that I know they can listen to me describe a painful occurrence without feeling the pain themselves.? I don?t want to cause other people pain, and sometimes, when I?m confiding to the Fs who are close to me, I realize it?s affecting them, and I end up trying to comfort them and telling them it?s not so bad.? With a T, I know I can describe exactly how bad I feel, because they won?t necessarily feel it with me.

?I don?t have empathy; I can?t feel what they?re feeling, but I can step back a bit and hear the logic of what they?re trying to get across,? says John, ENTP,? ?I can understand their argument.????????

The PEOPLE Process Type Wheel

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Also, when emotions are strong, Ts can remain untouched by them and continue thinking clearly.? I wish I had a Ts ability not to feel the pain or confusion of others, especially when it?s someone close to me, because then I wouldn?t be so anxious to make it go away.

?My husband, an INTJ, is able to remain calm when I?m upset, which is not my usual experience,? says Marthanne, ENFJ.? ?Usually, when I get upset, everyone around me gets twice as upset, which is quite annoying.? I remember the first Thanksgiving we spent together when we were dating.? I was cooking the turkey, and I had not allowed the right amount of time and I was supposed to take it from my house to his house.? I was all upset, but he didn?t get upset, or show impatience or condemnation for my being upset.? He just listened through the feeling somehow to what the problem and the solution were.?

?I can look at it clearly, without emotion,? says Pam, INTJ.? ?If you?re looking for someone to help you solve a problem, I?m a good one to talk to.?

Also, Ts are more able to keep in mind that even though someone is making a very good case that they have been wronged, there is probably another side to the story.

?I don?t let emotions get in the way and I try to stay fair,? says Jamie, ISTJ.? ?I?ve learned the hard way that there are two sides to everything, so even though their emotions are legitimate, I should not take sides based on hearing one person?s side of it.? I can listen and commiserate and say, ?Wow, that?s really rough on you,? instead of ?That?s totally unfair!??

Fs might try to be good listeners simply because people like good listeners.? But Ts usually need a different rationale.? They may decide to become good listeners because it makes them more effective in their work.? Good listening, for example, is important in the work of parenting.

?When I was raising children, I realized how important it was to be a good listener,? says Dee, ENTP.? ?I raised a 6-year old and 12-year-old from my husband?s first marriage, and the first year we lived together, I was amazed at how much they demanded my attention.? They really needed to talk, especially because their mom had been dying for years.? Kids have a way of focusing your attention.? They?ll tell you, ?Mom, you?re not listening,??

Good listening is also important in the workplace, and Ts often get their initial insights about the importance of listening from workplace training or experience.

?I worked on a project with two other people where we had to interview managers,? says John, ENTP.? ?We would get together after we?d interviewed a manager to discuss what we?d heard, but we?d spend the whole time arguing about what they had really said.? Finally, I started to take notes and write them up afterwards.? We were shocked to see that we do a lot of interpreting and extrapolating.? For example, a guy would say, ?We manage on performance,? and we thought he must mean he?s measuring the outcome of the training programs.? Then we?d find out he wasn?t measuring the outcomes.? ?Didn?t he say that??? someone would ask, but when we consulted the notes, we realized that he never said he was measuring performance.? After that insight, we became much more effective interviewers.? We could ask great follow-up questions because now we were listening to what people actually said.?

?Once we had a series of staff training on listening,? says Jamie, ISTJ.? ?We?d do an exercise where you listen, and then repeat it back to make sure you understood what they intended.? My first reaction was:? ?That?s positively silly; I know what they said.?? But when we did the exercise it was like, ?Oh my goodness, I didn?t really hear what they were saying at all.?? Just knowing that so much miscommunication is possible opened my mind to the thought that listening isn?t just hearing, there?s more to it.

?The other part of that training was that we should not just listen to words, but also to the feeling behind it.? For example, if they said, ?You never do your share of the laundry,? I would think we were talking about laundry, but what the person is really saying is ?I feel used.? We?re not honest partners.? I?m just here to do chores for you,? It is about being valued in the relationship, and that?s what really needs to be addressed.?

Resource:? The Type Reporter, No. 98

Sensing Listening Strengths

Tuesday, March 20th, 2012

?I remember all the facts and details.?

If the gift of Intuitive listeners is that they can put wings on what you say, the gift of Sensing listeners is that they can put arms and legs on what you say.? I can?t tell you how many times my conversations with my Sensing friends have resulted in my suddenly being able to move on a problem that had me stuck in place.? After I talk to them, I know the product to buy, the service to call, the information to download, or the location to drive to.?

The PEOPLE Process Assessment Wheel

Another gift of Sensing types is that they can often remember the facts and details that people tell them.? It means a lot to see a person six months after you?ve talked, and hear them ask, ?How did that problem with your daughter come out??

?My strengths are that I?m good at keeping track of people and what they?re doing.? It makes them feel special,? says Dan, ESTP.? ?For example, my friend told me a few months ago that he?s interested in a graduate program, and I asked him about that recently, and I think he liked that.?

?My strength as a listener is that I remember all the facts and details,? says Patty, ESTJ.? ?A client might call me back after five years and say, ?Hi, I?m sure you don?t remember me, but you tested my daughter.?? I say, ?Of course I remember you.? Your daughter wore a purple sweater that day and her birthday is April 11.?? I don?t do it on purpose.? It?s just that all that stuff goes in there and gets filed.?

Sensing types are also often alert to the sensory information about the speaker, so if their words don?t match their body language, Ss will probably pick up on it.

?My strength as a listener is that I notice all the sensory stuff besides their listening:? their tone of voice, the look on their face, the agitation in their bodies,? says Sharon, ISTP.? ?I may not even hear the words.? sometimes I?ll say to a person, ?You said this, but everything about you says something else.?? I might find out later that I was right that they were stressed out, even if it was about something other than what they were talking about.? That?s why I don?t like e-mails, because you can?t see or hear all the other stuff in an email.?

Another strength of some Sensing listeners, and one that is worth imitating, is their ability to ?see? in their minds what the person is describing.

?When people are talking to me, it?s like I?m running a movie in my mind?s eye,? says Patty, ESTJ.? ?I?m visualizing it, and that makes it more fun to listen, and helps me really be with the person.?

Resource:? The TYPE Reporter, No. 98, The gift of Listening, Part 2

Mistakes We Make When Teaching Type

Monday, February 13th, 2012

This article is not just for professional trainers of type.

Sure, there are lots of complaints that professionals are making mistakes, that they?re making statements about the theory that aren?t true, making statements about the types that put people on the defensive, not telling people enough to answer their questions or excite them about the power of the theory, or telling them so much they get lost in all the lingo and complications of it. But this article is not just for professional trainers of type. It?s for everyone who has more than a passing interest in type, and that includes you and me. Why? Because all learners of type naturally become teachersof type.???

The PEOPLE Process Assessment Wheel

You will want to know the types of the people in your life. They are the ones who will make the words come alive for you. I had read that SJs were organized, practical, and persistent. But those were just words to me until an SJ came to our business and improvements that had been talked about for years finally began to happen because he kept gently pushing and pushing them to completion.

I had read that NTs were global and critical, but those were just words to me until I had an NT edit my writing. He suggested many, many changes, but rather than hating it, I was delighted. Listening to him opened up my viewpoint miles wider, amd made my ideas much clearer.

I had read that SPs were physical and playful, but those were just words to me until my SP friend and I had spent many afternoons with our children, wandering along rivers and through woods, and I?d come home filled with light and air and the joy of having a body and living in the natural world.

I had read that NFs see the best in people and want to bring that out, but those were just words to me until one afternoon when I was confiding to an NF friend that I was worried about my son?s recent behavior. Somehow, by her questions and reminding me of things, the afternoon ended with me excited again about the great potential lying in that little boy.

The gifts of SJs, NTs, SPs, and NFs are no longer just words for me, they are sights and sounds and feelings. I have real examples of them in my life.

A second reason to know the types of the people in your life is so you can solve some of the problems you might be having with them. For example, I used to listen to my ISFJ sister complain about her life, and naturally, because I?m Intuitive, I?d suggest all kinds of ways that she could make ?a new life? for herself. But my suggestions involved radical changes in her situation, things she had no stomach for, so she always ended up having to come up with a million reasons why she couldn?t follow my advice. But ever since I?ve known her type, I?ve stopped doing that. Now I listen to her problems, and praise her for her loyalty and ability to endure difficult situations. Then she herself is able to think of small changes she could make to improve things.

I never would have had the opportunity to understand type in its living context, or to have it make such improvements in my relationships if I hadn?t taken the time and trouble to find out what type my family, friends, and colleagues were. I could not persuade all of them to go out and take workshops given by professionals, and with the majority of them, I could not guess their type without their input. If I wanted to know their types, I had to go through all the steps of ?training? them in it myself, and doing it in an informal setting.

But I taught the people in my world about type without any preparation, guidelines, or instruction on how to teach type. I had learned a lot about type, but nothing about how to teach it. And I think I made a lot of mistakes. I wish I had learned some basic guidelines for giving introductions to type, so I could have avoided some of the errors in the trial and error period.

Then recently, I heard a speech by Jean Kummerow, an ESTJ psychologist, management consultant, MBTI? trainer, and co-author of the book Lifetypes (1989 Warner). In that speech I felt I had found the ?basics.? It seems to me that if you follow Kummerow?s guidelines, you?ll give people the maximum opportunity to find themselves in their type at their first introduction to it, get excited about the information, and put it to good use in their lives.

A Checklist For Introducing Type

Let people do a ?Self-assessment? before getting their results from the MBTI?.

Describe the preferences in an accurate, positive and unbiased way, and remember to use qualifiers like ?most? and ?many.?

Give examples from the literature, your own life, and the world of the trainee.

Don?t read too much into MBTI? scores.

Make your goal simple: to teach the person the meaning of the eight preferences, and help them choose their type.

Provide follow-up reinforcement somehow, and give adequate handouts.

(The TYPE Reporter, Excerpt from Issue No. 38, written by Susan Scanlon.)

(Myers-Briggs Type Indicator is a trademark or registered trademark of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Trust in the United States and other countries.)

The Surprising Results of Servant Leadership

Monday, January 30th, 2012

Guest Post by:? Lee Ellis - As originally seen at: ?www.linked2Leadership.com

As a POW in Vietnam, I was typically the junior ranking and youngest person in my cell block. This meant that I was always a follower and never a formal leader. I used to think that this meant that I didn?t have influence. ?

But in retrospect, I see that I did have influence. And one way it came was through being a joyful doer.

Gettin? Busy

The truth is that I felt better when I was involved in the action so I stepped forward to do whatever needed to be done?clean the dirty latrine, sweep the floor, or deliver a very important message under dangerous circumstances. The lesson I learned was that serving and doing all the little things that others might avoid brings respect and ultimately influence.

And, this type of servant leadership made an impact after I returned to continue my full-time military career.

Even though I was behind my peers after being away, this leadership tactic was a primary factor in making up lost time and being promoted to a senior officer.

?The lesson I learned was that serving and doing all the little things that others might avoid brings respect and ultimately influence.?

Young and Hungry to Serve

I had not thought about this lately until last week while interacting with a group of college students (Air Force ROTC cadets) in San Antonio at the Air Education and Training Command?s 2012 Symposium. The Air Force Association (AFA), cohost for this event, had invited a number of Air Force ROTC Cadets ? all college students to assist with security and logistics at the Exposition in the convention center.

Since I was operating out of the AFA booth, my host volunteered these impressive young folks to help in any way I needed.

They were all bright and impressive young folks and it was soon obvious why they were chosen to attend this high-level event as guests of AFA and the Air Force.? The senior-ranking cadet took charge and managed the most important job of door security, insuring a regular rotation of sentries from 6:30 AM until 7:00 PM.? Other cadets helped me with the book signing by carting in books, stuffing bookmarks, collecting money, and scanning credit cards.

?Watching them carefully for a day and a half, I saw that even in this elite group, some stood out above their peers due to their willingness to get involved and commit totally to the task at hand.?

Rising to the Top

Watching them and listening to them carefully for a day and a half, I realized that even in this elite group, some stood out above their peers due to their willingness to get involved and commit totally to the task at hand.

All the students were sharp and helpful, but the ones that I?ll remember best are those who stepped forward first and then remained eagerly engaged until the job was done.

They won my heart and gained my highest respect?and that is powerful influence.

I appreciate the opportunity to be reminded of this lesson?that joyfully serving others is a powerful way to gain influence?even when you are young and have no position or formal power. It?s also a reminder that we are never too old or too important to learn lessons about influence.? After all, influence is what leadership is all about.

Regardless of your age or level of influence, how does this story impact your day-to-day work? With pure motives, what acts of service can you do today that will make far-reaching impact in the future? The only way to find out is to just do it.?And if you have a servant leadership story, share it in the comments section below. I would love to hear your story!

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Be sure and read Lee’s book:? Leading with Honor:? Leadership Lessons from the Hanoi

Leading With Honor: Leadership Lessons from the Hanoi Hilton

Lee Ellis is founder and president of Leadership Freedom LLC and FreedomStar Media.
He is a leadership consultant, keynote speaker, and author in the areas of teambuilding, executive development, and assessments

“I Can’t Decide What Type I Am!” - Part 1

Tuesday, January 10th, 2012

According to the manual on the MBTI?, around 25% of the people who take the MBTI? score close to the middle on one or more of the dimensions. Although some of those people are able to identify their preferences in spite of their slight scores, other people aren?t able to identify their preferences in spite of their clear scores. So let?s say it evens out, and for around 25% of the people who take the MBTI?, their type is still an open question even after they?ve received their report forms.

If you believe that making a person familiar with their natural gifts and course of development is a worthwhile pursuit, then it probably bothers you when that?s not easy, and sometimes nearly impossible, to do. You?d probably like to know more about why people sometimes can?t decide what type they are, and what can be done about it.????

Participant's Package & Trainer's Manual

?To get closer to some answers on these questions, we?re going to use as an example a man named Bob. He?s a real person who has not been able to decide on his type in 13 years! Bob first took the MBTI? in 1977 and came out ISFP, but he didn?t feel that the profile fit him entirely. Since then he?s taken it 12 times, each time coming out a different type, each time feeling the profile didn?t entirely fit him.

You may be wondering why he doesn?t just drop the search for his type if the theory doesn?t seem to be working for him. ?I?ve tried,? he says, ?but it?s like one of those birthday candles that won?t go out when you blow it. I put it aside but I keep coming back to it.?

Bob is looking to the MBTI? to give him guidance in making a mid-life career change. He?s been a successful lawyer, but he hasn?t been happy as a lawyer. ?I had to work so hard just to keep up that it wasn?t fun. I saw other lawyers around me going great guns and still enjoying themselves. I want to find a career where I can do the same. I feel that if I knew my true type, I could start laying out a plan consistent with that type.?

We talked to some of the MBTI? experts who have had experience with people who have a hard time deciding on their type. We?re going to tell you what they recommend, and how it worked for Bob. In this issue we?ll look at what the experts recommend you do in a workshop setting to help people decide on their type, and how Bob reacted to these experiences. He is a good example of how frustrating, fascinating, and eventually satisfying it can be to help people find their true type.

Tell them t?s normal and give them some time.
For most of the people who are uncertain on one or more of the dimensions of the MBTI?, time usually takes care of the problem. After they?ve had some time to absorb the definitions of the functions and observe their own behavior, their type usually becomes clear to them.

If you?re giving a workshop on type, it?s probably a good idea to tell people up front that they may not be able to decide their type in the course of your workshop. Tell them that initial uncertainty about your type is normal. You don?t want to cause them any stress because they don?t fit into the theory right away. Be as general, positive, neutral, and non-suggestive as you can be about this issue.

And you might mention that some people may never be certain about what type they are. Some people are just more distinctly a type than others. You can see this even in small children. Some have a clear sense of who they are when they?re very young, some don?t have a clear sense of who they are until 30 or 40, and some are never sure. The important thing is, for most of these ?untypical? people, it?s not a problem. It?s no big deal.

Time and observing his own behavior did not help Bob decide on a type. In fact, the more time went by, the more uncertain he became. But Bob continued to pursue his type because of his own feeling that he had to know, not because poor training had made him feel that something was wrong with him.

Give them a variety of experiences in a workshop.
We talked to Janet Thuesen and Otto Kroeger, a team that has trained at least 10,000 people in type theory in the last 10 years and recently co-authored the book Type Talk (Delacorte, 1988). They said that a good way to help people decide what type they are is to offer them a variety of experiences in a workshop, especially the experience of being put into groups with others who are supposed to be the same type as they are, and seeing if they experience agreement and similarity.

In one of the first workshops on the MBTI? that I attended, the trainers asked all the Introverts to get into a group and all the Extraverts to get into a group. In the group of Introverts we were asked to answer the questions:

What do you like about being an Introvert? What don?t you like about being an Introvert? What do you like about Extraverts? What don?t you like about Extraverts?

Then we reported back to the group on what we had talked about and heard the Extraverts answer the same questions. We did the same thing on all four of the dimensions. I remember how powerful an experience that was for me. I still remember a woman saying ?When I hear Extraverts talking about what they?re going to do today, it makes me tired. I couldn?t possibly do all that in one day?? We all laughed and nodded our heads in agreement. That kind of clicking with other people strengthened my certainty that type worked, and that I was an Introvert.

I?ve also been present in several ?type-alike? groups since then where it became clear that one of us did not belong in that group. It?s an excellent method for helping people get clarity on their type. But it didn?t work for Bob. He attended one workshop where people were asked to go into groups with their like types and answer questions such as ?How are you in a team?? and ?How are you as a leader?? It didn?t settle anything for him. ?I went around and listened to different groups, and read the things they put up on the wall, but none of the groups rang out loud and clear to me,? he said.

Ask them to read several profiles and mark the parts they agree with.
Another thing Otto Kroeger recommends for people who can?t decide what type they are is that they do some homework. Their assignment is to read profiles on all the types that they might be, and mark the lines they agree strongly with, then add them up at the end. I did this with my husband when he was uncertain if he was an INTP or an ENTP. He had a terrible time deciding if he was an Extravert or an Introvert in the abstract, but he agreed with every line of the ENTP profile and not a single line of the INTP profile.

But Bob has been doing this kind of thing for 17 years. He has every book of profiles that has been published, and they?re all underlined and checked and X?d. However, none of the profiles really fits him completely, and over time.

Most of the profiles have some things that sound true for Bob, and some things that don?t. And on some days he feels like one type but the next day it might change. And sometimes it doesn?t even take a day. Before breakfast, he may be reading the profiles of the INFP and identifying with them, but later in the day, the ESFP and ISFP may sound better to him. For several days he may write in his journal about how he?s an SJ, but today write that he must be an SP because he feels so impulsive, playful, and physical.

Ask them to discuss it with people who know them.
The third thing Otto Kroeger suggests is that you ask people who know you well what they think. When I asked Bob to tell me the name of someone who knows him fairly well, and also knows type, he mentioned Katherine Myers, an INFP who has been familiar with type for most of her life.

Kathy Myers told me: ?His endless searching for self, and his insistence that he know what is at the core of him before he can make any decisions, reminds me of an INFP. It?s a weakness of the INFP, in fact. Like other NFs, INFPs need to operate out of their core, to be true to themselves. But without the E or the J to pull them out into the world, INFPs can really get stuck trying to figure themselves out.

?In more specific ways he also reminds me of an INFP. He?s very much in tune with other people, and responds to them so that they feel good about themselves. He speaks quietly, about things he?s enthusiastic about. He entertains beautifully, but he?s not a hail-fellow-well-met. He does it quietly and graciously. I?ve been trying to get him off this obsession with knowing what type he is. He feels he can?t move or decide on a career until he does. I tell him that he?s fortunate to be able to use each of the functions when it?s appropriate.?

I told Kathy Myers that I had two doubts about Bob being an INFP. One was that when he was young, he became a leader at just about every opportunity. He rattled off a dizzying list of leadership positions. He was president of his junior class in high school, and then of the whole student body in his senior year. A high school teacher told his parents he had never seen a better leader come through the system. In college, he was captain of his football team, president of his college fraternity, president of the leadership fraternity, and voted the best leader in his senior class. And all through his legal career, people were trying to persuade him to go into politics.

Why, I asked Kathy, would an Introvert place himself so often in front of, and in the middle of, groups? I cold see an Introvert being the leader of a group if they all shared a passionate interest, but Bob seemed to be the leader of a variety of groups, with no particular shared interests. ?Introverts can often be leaders,? Kathy said. ?I?m an Introvert and among other things I was the editor of the school paper, and voted most likely to succeed.?

And then I told her that in many hours of listening to Bob talk, I had never heard him make a large generalization, which Intuitives seem to need to do as much as they need to breathe. And when asked a question about his preferences, he referred to something he had done recently, instead of looking at his behavior over a lifetime and observing patterns. I?m usually hungry for specifics when I?m listening to Intuitives. When I?m listening to Bob, I?m hungry for a generalization.

Kathy said he seemed to be comfortable talking about the type theory, which was fairly abstract. She also said that she doubted an S would spend this much time trying to find out who they were. And I had to agree. If Bob was unlike any Intuitive I?d ever listened to, he was also unlike any Sensing type I?d ever listened to.

It?s hard for some people to put a type on themselves because on one or more of the dimensions, they really do have attributes from both sides. When you ask them to choose a type, you?re asking them to deny something about themselves that is important, but not ?typical.?

To be continued?

The TYPE Reporter, Excerpt from Vol. 5, No. 2, written by Susan Scanlon
www.typereporter.com

Myers-Briggs Type Indicator is a trademark or registered trademark of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Trust in the United States and other countries.

Our Favorite Type Breakthroughs

Monday, January 2nd, 2012

The TYPE Reporter, Excerpt from No. 102, Part 4,

written by Susan Scanlon

Naomi Quenk, INFP

Naomi Quenk was introduced to the MBTI 47 years ago and has been working with it ever since. She has been active in setting policy for its ethical use, researching, teaching and writing on many aspects of type, and used the MBTI in her clinical practice for over 25 years. She served as president of the Association for Psychological Type from 1985-1987. She is the author or co-author of numerous publications on type, including the 1998 revision of The MBTI Manual, and several books, including Was That Really Me?: How Everyday Stress Brings Out Our Hidden Personality; In the Grip: Understanding Type, Stress, and the Inferior Function (2nd ed.); and Essentials of Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Assessment. (www.cpp.org) or (www.capt.org.)

Once, an ESTJ woman and I got into a conversation about our favorite ages for our children. She said, ?My favorite age for my children was when they were infants.? I said, ?Mine too.? She said, ?I like infants because you can totally control them.? I said, ?I like infants because you don?t have to control them.?

As a result of that experience, I never assume I know someone?s type because of some behavior. I realized that people can have identical behaviors for completely different reasons.

The PEOPLE Process Wheel

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When I was a clinician in private practice, I got a message on my answering machine from a man saying he would like to see me for the first time, and he would like an appointment at 11 o?clock next Thursday. At first I took offense at his assumption that he could tell me when his appointment would be. Then I thought, well, wait a minute, the chances are this guy is some kind of TJ who has spent quite a long time deciding if he would go into psychotherapy, and once he made his decision, he was anxious to get on with it. That turned out to be the case, and I?m glad I had a chance to reflect because it prevented me from approaching this guy with a bias.

I sometimes hear people automatically assume that Js are doing things just to control people. It irritates me, because that is rarely their purpose. Js are just trying to do what they?re best at, which is to get the world organized and to get on with it. Actually, when it comes to controlling people, I?ve seen some Ps do that really well.

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Because our children grew up with type, they totally rejected it. They used to get irritated with us and say, ?Can?t you watch a TV program without typing everyone?!? My daughter would have nothing to do with type and wouldn?t take the Indicator, but when she was about 14, I caught her in a weak moment and said, ?Would you at least read the type description that I think you might be??

She read the profile of the INFP and got this sheepish expression on her face. ?Well, yes, ?she said, ?but wouldn?t the world be a better place if everyone were an INFP??

?Oh my God,? I thought. ?I?ve spent my life teaching people to respect differences and this is what my own daughter thinks.?

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In my experience, INFPs can sometimes be quite resistant to type. They seem to be defending their individuality, and saying, ?Nobody?s going to tell me that I can only be one of 16 types.?

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I counseled one couple where the husband was an ESTJ and the wife was an ENTP. One of his big complaints was that he?d come home from work and see a pile of clean laundry on the couch. The next day, however, it would still be there. It stuck in his craw, and he wondered how it was possible for his wife not to notice it.

I said to him, ?You notice the laundry and it?s hard to go about what you?re doing with it there.? ?That?s right, he said, and he seemed relieved that I could see it from his point of view. Then I said, ?But she really doesn?t notice it. She?s busy with the kids, and she?s not looking at the details. It?s just not important to her to have things in their place like it is for you.?

At the next session he told me, ?If it?s a fact that having the laundry put away is important to me and not to her, I will do it from now on.? Once it became a fact, he could fit it into his system, and deal with other things that were important to her and not to him.

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When my daughter was getting her library degree, she did a research project on the MBTI and children?s reading preferences. Teachers and librarians assume that children read fiction for fun, and non-fiction because they have to for a school project. But she discovered that little Ss read non-fiction because they love it.

One mother came in dragging her son and asked, ?What have you got for an 8-year old who hates to read?? My daughter asked the boy what he was interested in. He said, ?Airplanes.? My daughter gave him a half dozen books on how airplanes work, the people who fly them, and their history. A week later, the mother came back and said, ?I don?t know what you did to him, but he read all those books and he wants more.?

Sensing children often get labeled ?reluctant readers? because they are not reading what teachers give them to read. It?s just that they often don?t want to read about imaginary people. They want to read facts about the things that they are interested in and the adventures of real people.

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My daughter also learned from some of the mothers she interviewed that Introverted children often come to story time and just sit there and don?t participate in anything. Their mothers reported however, that as soon as they got home, the kids would take their teddy bears or their younger brothers and sisters, and tell them the story. They just needed to get out of the group setting to ?participate.?

(Myers-Briggs Type Indicator is a trademark or registered trademark of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Trust in the United States and other countries.)

Psychological Type And How It Benefits An Organization

Friday, December 2nd, 2011

Psychological type is a theory of personality developed by Swiss psychiatrist Dr. Carl G. Jung to explain the normal differences between healthy people. Jung concluded that differences in behavior result from people?s inborn tendencies to use their minds in different ways. Jung?s type theory defines patterns of normal behavior, or types, and gives an explanation of how types develop.???????

The PEOPLE Process Type Wheel

The mother and daughter team of Myers & Briggs further developed Jung?s theory creating the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator?, a self-report questionnaire designed to make Jung?s theory of psychological types understandable and useful in everyday life. After more than 50 years of research and development, the MBTI? is the most widely used instrument with more than two million indicators administered annually in the United States.

The PEOPLE Process takes type theory a step further making it ?useable?, simplifying the understanding and application of what often is a complicated process for people to work with. With all of the breadth and depth of the theory of Dr. Carl Jung and the MBTI?, The PEOPLE Process Wheel takes the theory of the four behavioral dimensions of how Energy is focused, how Information is gathered, how Decisions are made and how Action is taken and makes them easy to remember and use. Within each behavioral dimension, are two opposite poles ? preferences ? for which everyone has a natural preference (inborn strength) for one of the two opposites in each of the four behavioral dimensions.

As we use our preferences, we develop what the research defines as our psychological type: an underlying personality pattern resulting from the dynamic interaction of our four preferences, environmental influences and our own choices. People tend to develop behaviors, skills, and attitudes associated with their type, and those with types that differ from yours, will likely be opposite you in many ways. Each type represents a valuable and reasonable way to be. Each type has its own potential strengths, as well as its likely blind spots.

Psychological type has been applied as a tool for many years by a variety of users including those in:

  • Small businesses and large multinational corporations
  • Service industries and manufacturing concerns
  • Consulting and training services
  • Government at all levels
  • Established firms and new entrepreneurial ventures
  • Educational and health-care institutions

In general, psychological type functions as a tool that helps people in organizations:

  • Understand themselves and their behaviors
  • Appreciate others so as to make constructive use of individual differences
  • Approach problems in different yet healthy ways and thus be more productive

Specifically, organizations use type to:

  • Make the most of their human resources
  • Leverage individuals? natural strengths
  • Improve teamwork
  • Understand and adapt to differences in leadership/management style
  • Enhance effective communications between supervisors, peers, employees, and customers
  • Assist in career development
  • Resolve conflict
  • Coach individuals
  • Design training activities
  • Recognize employees? unique contributions
  • Develop skills in creativity, time management, and stress management

Myers-Briggs Type Indicator is a trademark or registered trademark of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Trust in the United States and other countries.

How We Make Decisions - Thinking or Feeling

Monday, October 3rd, 2011

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The third dimension of behavior in psychological type theory is how we prefer to make decisions - Thinking or Feeling.

Each behavior is on a continuum with a preference for one or the other, the degree of which falling somewhere along the continuum. A person could be a ?strong? Thinker or Feeler, meaning they would fall completely to the far left or right of the continuum. The research says that we are, however, one or the other, not both. Even though we use both preferences throughout our day in the Decision dimension, we don?t use each preference with equal ease. Our inborn preference is our natural strength and according to research we are born with a preference for one behavior over the other ? part of our DNA.

In the American population, 50% are Thinkers and 50 percent are Feelers. Of the Thinkers, about 65% are men, and of the Feelers, 65% are women.?

The PEOPLE Process Type Wheel

Thinking and Feeling describe the two ways people make decisions, or come to conclusions. Thinking and Feeling both describe rational decision-making processes. It?s not that Thinkers have no feelings, or that Feelers are incapable of logic, it?s just that they use very different criteria to make their decisions.

Thinkers make decisions more objectively, weighing the pros and cons. For Thinkers ? logic rules. When making a decision, Thinkers take a step back and analyze the situation, logically and impersonally, asking, ?Does this make sense? What are the pros and cons? What are the ramifications of the decision?? Thinkers objectify the decision.

Feelers make decisions based on how they feel about the issue and how others will be affected by it. Feelers inject themselves into the situation asking, ?How do I feel about this? How will it affect me and others? Is this the right thing to do? What are my personal values telling me to do?? Feelers personalize the situation.

Personal feelings and values are important to Feeling types and often they will go to great lengths to remain true to their beliefs. Thinkers are logical and analytical while Feelers are sensitive and empathetic.

It?s no surprise that preferences for Thinking or Feeling influence career choices. The helping professions attract large numbers of Feelers because this gives them an opportunity to fulfill one of their greatest needs, helping people. Feelers have a drive to understand others and receive satisfaction from assisting others in whatever way they can. Business and management attracts a lot of Thinkers because when it comes to being able to make a decision that is based on the bottom line and consider what?s best for the overall company, they can more easily make the decision and take action. Thinkers can step back from the decision, analyze it logically and come to conclusion based on what is best for the company. A Feeler usually steps forward, putting himself in the shoes of the individuals being affected within that company, and are strongly influenced by their own personal beliefs and values in making the decision.

Thinkers are often attracted to careers dealing with manufacturing, research and development. Thinkers are most satisfied with jobs where there is a minimum of employee caretaking and like working with other people that are as competent as they are. Thinkers place more emphasis on being truthful, even when it hurts feelings, than being tactful.

Feelers are naturally more attentive and concerned with other people because they have a strong need to be liked. This can be seen as being helpful and friendly and in practically every organization across the country, you can find the nurturer, the person whom coworkers go for emotional support and comfort. Whether appreciated by the company or not, these people provide a valuable service.

On teams, Thinkers are great at being able to size up a situation and put the necessary steps in place to accomplish the goal but it?s the Feelers that create the connection with others that allows the team members to function together, and get the job done ? because of feeling that their contribution to the team matters.

It?s very valuable for Thinkers and Feelers to work together. My preference for making Decisions is Thinking and I am often considered abrupt by others because of my ability to impersonalize an issue and consider the logical and possible consequences. My Feeling abilities are not well developed. I care greatly for people and desire to be of service and assistance to them, but I don?t come across that way. So, I rely on the Feeling people in my life to provide input for me when I?m weighing a decision that affects other people ? and practically every decision we make does affect others.

On the other hand, a dear friend of mine has a preference for making Decisions as a Feeler and calls on the phone to discuss situations in her life because of my ability to impersonalize and assist her in thinking of things she hadn?t considered because of her strong desire to connect with people and assist them at a personal level.

Probably one of the greatest contributions of ?type? in my life has been with the friendship of my dear ?Sister Paula.? Paula has a preference for Feeling and as I?ve already discussed, my preference in making Decisions is for Thinking. Paula tells me that once I introduced her to personality type and explained my type preferences, she was able to quit projecting her expectations of my behavior based on her own process. This knowledge has done wonders for our relationship.

When you factor in knowledge of personality type into your Decision making, it becomes clear that all of us need each other for the wealth of valuable contributions we offer in our business endeavors, family relationships and friendships. In fact, our differences just make us that much more valuable for the point of view and experience we are able to provide one another.

There are four behavior dimensions in personality type: how our Energy is focused, how we gather Information, how we make Decisions, and how we take Action. Decision is the third dimension and all four are equally important. Having knowledge and understanding of our preferences in each of the four dimensions of our associates and loved ones can profoundly affect the quality of our life and relationships.

The Five Relationship Management Attributes Necessary For Successful Leadership

Wednesday, June 29th, 2011

The PEOPLE Process Type Wheel

Leadership is the ability to inspire and motivate others. Each one of us is required to exhibit leadership capabilities every day, in our professional and personal lives?a mother inspiring her children to do their best in school; an HR Manager attempting to lift the morale of the company; a politician asking for our vote; a president of a corporation asking management to increase productivity. It doesn?t matter what the size of the organization is, understanding your personal leadership strengths can assist in accomplishing your goals.

In a study of Leadership, Emotional Intelligence and Personality Type conducted in 2004 by Richmond, Rollin and Brown, the findings were:

  • The five most important leadership attributes were identified as Vision, Strategic Thinking, Relationship Building, Execution and People Development.
  • Emotional Intelligence attributes are essential to successful leadership, especially the ?relationship management? attributes?Vision, Relationship Building and People Development.
  • Of the remaining attributes, all the Emotional Intelligence competencies are more important than all the general leadership attributes, such as External/market Orientation, Financial Acumen, and Planning.

The Center for Creative Leadership in studying why managers derail on their way to becoming executives found four themes that emerged:

  1. Problems with interpersonal relationships
  2. Failure to meet business objectives
  3. Failure to build and lead a team
  4. Inability to change or adapt during a transition

In short, difficulties with ?relationship management? attributes (vision, relationship building and people development) were identified as prime contributors to the failure of otherwise promising executive careers.

Personality Type and Leadership

The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator? identifies common differences among normal people. ?The essence of the theory is that much seemingly random variation in behavior is actually quite orderly and consistent? based on differences in the way individuals prefer to perceive information and reach conclusions (Myers, et al, 1998).?

Research shows that personality type explains some of the variation in leadership behavior and perceived effectiveness. A brief summary includes:

  • Leaders come from all 16 personality types, however, nearly every study of leaders by type finds TJs over-represented relative to other types.
  • Research shows that leaders of different types focus on different aspects of their roles and also choose to handle the same activities differently.

Leadership studies usually indicate that most corporate leaders exhibit TJ preferences. For example, 58% of participants in Center for Creative Leadership programs prefer TJ (MBTI Manual, p. 327). TJ leaders ?are considered tough minded, executive, analytical?leaders who communicate their confidence in the?primacy of focusing on logical outcomes. TJs may be seen by others as?too quick to judge and act, and tactless in their style of communication?? (MBTI Manual, pps. 52-53).

Implications of these studies for Leaders

Leaders can use the findings from the above studies to gain the following insights into what their executives, and peers may be expecting from them:

  • Assess and increase your effectiveness in building relationships, developing people, and thinking strategically.
  • To excel at the highly-ranked ?relationship management? attributes, develop your Emotional Intelligence capabilities such as Self-Awareness, Empathy, and Adaptability.
  • Consider your effectiveness in providing vision and inspiration, executing work to plan, taking initiative, and fostering teamwork.
  • When seeking to influence others, be aware of differences in what each of you values in leaders.

Leadership Styles of the 16 Personality Types

Type: Motivates Others By:
ISTJ Providing precise, accurate and timely information
ISFJ Presenting factual information personally to influence people to understand the job that needs to be done
INTJ Describing end result desired, by connecting actions, intentions and desired outcomes
INFJ Building enduring relationships through cooperation and acting on values that promote well-being
ISTP Using tangible goals to get things moving
INTP Talking about theory and discussing outcomes
ISFP Encouraging others to take action in an easy-going manner
INFP Creating alternative solutions
ESTP Quickly acting to solve problems for others
ESFP Relating to people at a personal level to get them involved
ENTP Using their problem-solving skills
ENFP Engaging with others to share ideas, & brainstorming
ESTJ Using specific facts and a systematic method
ENTJ Systematic & logical action; ideas and global issues
ESFJ Practical, hands-on action, moving toward completion of a project
ENFJ Energizing with their ?assertive? and personable nature

Knowing yourself well and understanding how others function is fundamental to building strong relationships and effective leadership. Leadership is about behavior and the psychology of leadership as theorized by psychological type allows individuals to recognize their demonstrated behaviors as expressions of their type and to apply type theory as a way to enhance leader development.

Clearly, based on the stated desired leadership qualities, it?s easy to understand the importance a thorough knowledge of personality type can provide. Type is about ?relationship management? and ?people development.? To understand and apply type theory is to be able to motivate and lead others?including ourselves.

Explore the Benefits of Humility in Business

Wednesday, May 4th, 2011

Leadership humility is rare and doesn?t necessarily enjoy the recognition it serves, says Wikus van Vuuren, a director at GIMT. ?Humility is unfortunately often perceived as a weakness in business when, in fact, it can be a tremendous asset.????

The PEOPLE Process Type Wheel

Humble leaders who openly understand and develop their weaknesses and capitalize on their strengths often create environments that encourage people to grow, which in turn grows the organization, he says.

?Some of the most successful organizations worldwide have leaders who inconspicuously ?stand out? due to their humble nature, rather than their arrogance and flamboyance,? Van Vuuren says.

Indeed, the leader who is humble never allows the power of his position to cloud his judgment. He respects the unique contribution individuals have to make, and does not get stuck on their perceived weaknesses, he adds.

?One of the greatest strengths of humble leaders is that they never assume they know all the answers and allow people to explain things to them. They look for the opportunity to learn and use every opportunity to make others feel valued.?

Apart from personal issues, there is no real harm in letting people know what you view as your strengths and weaknesses. ?A good step would be to implement a system where you can get direct feedback from your executive team, your clients, your staff and even people in your personal circle. While this system will create an open and honest company culture, it will also contribute significantly to your own personal growth.?

Van Vuuren says you should connect with your manager, peers and those that report to you. ?You will make them feel more comfortable about exploring their own opportunities for development.?

Honest leaders are also good listeners, he says. ?Do you have a tendency, when someone starts explaining something, to interrupt them to make sure they know that you already know what they are talking about? The next time this happens, try something new. Listen. Let them finish their explanation.

?Ask lots of questions, validate them, then add your comments.?

In the act of being humble, you make others feel important and valued, Van Vuuren said.

?That is the gift of the humble leader. Besides, it is more refreshing and empowering being around humble people than inflated egos.?

(Myers-Briggs Type Indicator is a trademark or registered trademark of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Trust in the United States and other countries.)