Posts Tagged ‘communications’

“Give me the facts, maam…..just the facts.”

Saturday, January 12th, 2013

When describing the decor of my home to a Sensor, I said things such as, “the furniture is traditional with oriental accent pieces mixed in, the front yard has blue pots and a blue wrought iron fence.” 

The PEOPLE Process Type Wheel

The PEOPLE Process Type Wheel

“From the front door entryway, what do you see?” asked the Sensor.  “How wide is the front door”, and “how deep is the entry?”  “Once inside the house, where is the living room?”  “How many steps until you reach the kitchen?”  How many windows in the kitchen?”

As an Intuitive, my description of the house was an overview of the general plan and scheme of the decor with such words as, contemporary mixed with Oriental theme, rooms opening up into each other to give a feeling of freedom, white carpet with bold accent colors.

As an author of personalty-type training products and conductor of trainings, it is amazing to me when I have an experience such as this because it brings home to me how important it is to understand each other’s preference for giving and receiving Information as a Sensor or as an Intuitive.

I can honestly tell you that the Intuitive becomes impatient with the lengthy, factual and detailed descriptions.   And, I’m sure the Sensor becomes frustrated with the Intuitive’s broad stroke, overview and generalized description.

During this conversation, I had to keep reminding myself,  this is a Sensor and he cannot see the picture unless you give the facts and details.

Thank goodness I understand this.   As I think back over my life prior to becoming involved so deeply in personality type theory, I am amazed that I was able to communicate with people at all and get my point across. No wonder I had so many ”dead end”  conversations with people.

Do yourself a favor - learn everything you can about type theory and use it!  Your communications with your family, friends and co-workers will improve tremendously!

Personality Type and Careers

Friday, November 16th, 2012

A thorough understanding of your personality type can be a tremendous?guide that can help you to:???

The PEOPLE Process Type Wheel

  • Choose a new job or career
  • Change your job or career
  • Increase your satisfaction with your present career??????

Your personality type can assist you in developing your career goals and establishing a??process to reach those goals. When you use Side 1 of The PEOPLE Process Wheel to decide your four-letter type, you can study the Profile Sheet that is within the participant package for your type and gain a thorough understanding of your strengths ? your unique gifts.

The more you understand about yourself, the better your decisions will be and the more effectively you will be able to implement those decisions. Your personality preferences can help you decide what you want to do, how to approach that field and get what you want.

To briefly review, personality type theory was developed by Dr. Carl Jung in the early 1900s. Dr. Jung sought to explain the normal differences between healthy people. Jung espoused that the differences in people?s behavior was a result from people?s inborn tendencies to use their minds in different ways. As people act on these tendencies, they develop patterns of behavior.???

We have different energy levels, notice different aspects of the world around us, make decisions based on different criteria and structure our lives in different ways depending on what makes us most comfortable. These characteristics combine to create the whole personality. Dr. Jung identified four dimensions that make up our personality type ? and these are part of our DNA ? they are inborn traits.

The four dimensions are: Energy, Information, Decision, Action, and are used by us hundreds of times a day. Each dimension consists of two opposite poles. Picture each dimension as a continuum with a mid-point in the center. Each of us has a natural inborn preference (strength) for one side of the continuum or the other in each of the four dimensions.

Turn The PEOPLE Process Wheel to Side 2 and review how someone should treat you in the four windows that match your four letter type. This will give you insight into the types of work and surroundings that will be most fulfilling for you. For instance, if in the Energy behavior dimension you chose Introvert you will see that the way you prefer to be treated is:

  • Relate one-on-one
  • Value their need for privacy
  • Allow them time to change focus
  • Ask questions to draw them out
  • Do not pressure for an instant response

This tells you that you like to work alone and don?t need a lot of supervision. You?re great at putting things together behind the scenes.

However, if you chose Extravert in the Energy behavior dimension, you?ll find that you like to have a lot of interaction with others and you want them to:

  • Listen attentively
  • Be actively responsive
  • Be energetic & enthusiastic
  • Support their need to communicate
  • Recognize their need for social interaction

Extraverts like to be able to bounce ideas off of others and get immediate feedback. They would be very frustrated working all alone in a cubicle on a project by themselves.

In the Information behavior dimension, if you chose Sensing as your preference, you?ll find that you have skills in dealing with facts and details and when receiving information from someone you prefer that they:

  • Be orderly and organized
  • Show facts with evidence
  • Be direct and to the point
  • Draw on your experience
  • Be practical because you are

If you chose Intuition in the Information behavior dimension, you are terrific at coming up with creative solutions, marketing direction and ?out of the box? ideas and when receiving information you prefer they:

  • Give you an overview
  • Have a vision of the future
  • Appeal to your imagination
  • Encourage your need to explore
  • Allow for the expansion of ideas

When it comes to making a Decision, a Thinking person is logical, steps back and objectifies the decision, preferring to be treated this way:

  • Expect questions
  • Use logic
  • Be calm and reasonable
  • Be brief, concise, yet thorough
  • Present information for their analysis

A Feeling person personalizes decisions asking, ?How does this affect me and the people involved?? This person likes you to remember to:

  • Be honest and sincere
  • Be personal and friendly
  • Share with them your feelings
  • Encourage them to share their feelings
  • Allow them time to know and trust you

In the Action behavior dimension, the Judging person likes to control their environment and prefers that you:

  • Don?t disturb their order
  • Be prepared and deliberate
  • Value their time because they do
  • Finalize whenever & wherever possible
  • Take their deadlines seriously

And, the Perceiving person values spontaneity above all and prefers that you:

  • Be open to options & changes
  • Use variety in your approach
  • Let them set their own deadlines
  • Make use of their resourcefulness
  • Encourage possibility-thinking

Does this give you an idea of how to approach finding out your strengths and preferred way of being treated so that you can decide on the career that best suits you? Continue studying Side 2 of the Wheel, determining your strengths and preferred way of being treated by others. Once you have analyzed this information, identify the types of careers that include your preferences and strengths ? the way you like to be treated and are most comfortable.

On the flip side of the Profile Sheet that matches your four-letter type, are a few of the careers that are suited for your strengths. Take a look at these as they will give you a basis of thinking about and identifying other rewarding types of work.

 

The Five Relationship Attributes Necessary For Successful Leadership

Friday, October 12th, 2012

Leadership is the ability to inspire and motivate others. Each one of us is required to exhibit leadership capabilities every day, in our professional and personal lives?a mother inspiring her children to do their best in school; an HR Manager attempting to lift the morale of the company; a politician asking for our vote; a president of a corporation asking management to increase productivity. It doesn?t matter what the size of the organization is, understanding your personal leadership strengths can assist in accomplishing your goals.?

The PEOPLE Process Type Wheel

In a study of Leadership, Emotional Intelligence and Personality Type conducted in 2004 by Richmond, Rollin and Brown, the findings were:

  • The five most important leadership attributes were identified as Vision, Strategic Thinking, Relationship Building, Execution and People Development.
  • Emotional Intelligence attributes are essential to successful leadership, especially the ?relationship management? attributes?Vision, Relationship Building and People Development.
  • Of the remaining attributes, all the Emotional Intelligence competencies are more important than all the general leadership attributes, such as External/market Orientation, Financial Acumen, and Planning.

The Center for Creative Leadership in studying why managers derail on their way to becoming executives found four themes that emerged:

  1. Problems with interpersonal relationships
  2. Failure to meet business objectives
  3. Failure to build and lead a team
  4. Inability to change or adapt during a transition

In short, difficulties with ?relationship management? attributes (vision, relationship building and people development) were identified as prime contributors to the failure of otherwise promising executive careers.

Personality Type and Leadership

The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator? identifies common differences among normal people. ?The essence of the theory is that much seemingly random variation in behavior is actually quite orderly and consistent? based on differences in the way individuals prefer to perceive information and reach conclusions (Myers, et al, 1998).?

Research shows that personality type explains some of the variation in leadership behavior and perceived effectiveness. A brief summary includes:

  • Leaders come from all 16 personality types, however, nearly every study of leaders by type finds TJs over-represented relative to other types.
  • Research shows that leaders of different types focus on different aspects of their roles and also choose to handle the same activities differently.

Leadership studies usually indicate that most corporate leaders exhibit TJ preferences. For example, 58% of participants in Center for Creative Leadership programs prefer TJ (MBTI Manual, p. 327). TJ leaders ?are considered tough minded, executive, analytical?leaders who communicate their confidence in the?primacy of focusing on logical outcomes. TJs may be seen by others as?too quick to judge and act, and tactless in their style of communication?? (MBTI Manual, pps. 52-53).

Implications of these studies for Leaders

Leaders can use the findings from the above studies to gain the following insights into what their executives, and peers may be expecting from them:

  • Assess and increase your effectiveness in building relationships, developing people, and thinking strategically.
  • To excel at the highly-ranked ?relationship management? attributes, develop your Emotional Intelligence capabilities such as Self-Awareness, Empathy, and Adaptability.
  • Consider your effectiveness in providing vision and inspiration, executing work to plan, taking initiative, and fostering teamwork.
  • When seeking to influence others, be aware of differences in what each of you values in leaders.

Leadership Styles of the 16 Personality Types

Type: Motivates Others By:
ISTJ Providing precise, accurate and timely information
ISFJ Presenting factual information personally to influence people to understand the job that needs to be done
INTJ Describing end result desired, by connecting actions, intentions and desired outcomes
INFJ Building enduring relationships through cooperation and acting on values that promote well-being
ISTP Using tangible goals to get things moving
INTP Talking about theory and discussing outcomes
ISFP Encouraging others to take action in an easy-going manner
INFP Creating alternative solutions
ESTP Quickly acting to solve problems for others
ESFP Relating to people at a personal level to get them involved
ENTP Using their problem-solving skills
ENFP Engaging with others to share ideas, & brainstorming
ESTJ Using specific facts and a systematic method
ENTJ Systematic & logical action; ideas and global issues
ESFJ Practical, hands-on action, moving toward completion of a project
ENFJ Energizing with their ?assertive? and personable nature

Knowing yourself well and understanding how others function is fundamental to building strong relationships and effective leadership. Leadership is about behavior and the psychology of leadership as theorized by psychological type allows individuals to recognize their demonstrated behaviors as expressions of their type and to apply type theory as a way to enhance leader development.

Clearly, based on the stated desired leadership qualities, it?s easy to understand the importance a thorough knowledge of personality type can provide. Type is about ?relationship management? and ?people development.? To understand and apply type theory is to be able to motivate and lead others?including ourselves.

Personality Type & The Coaching Process

Thursday, October 4th, 2012

The application of personality type into the coaching process?both the person being coached and the type of other people in their life?is particularly valuable because you can identify and develop his or her strengths, assist them in recognizing blind spots and how to manage them and strategize a method for personal and career development.?

The PEOPLE Process Type Assessment Wheel

Step 1: Assess the Client?s Type
Guide the person through Side 1 of the The PEOPLE Process Wheel, explaining each of the four dimensions of behavior, the two preferences within each behavior dimension, and have them choose their four letter type.

Step 2: Determine Strengths and Challenges
By yourself, review the person?s type from the standpoint of their strengths as it relates to their personality type. Think through the description of their preferences on side 1 of the Wheel and determine which qualities are assets and which present the greatest challenge. Have the person answer the following questions:

  • As you read through the description of your personality type preferences, which ones seem like assets and which present the greatest challenges?
  • If someone wanted to have a positive relationship with you, what fundamental things about your type would they need to understand?
  • Which aspects of your psychological type are the most difficult for you to accept or change?
  • Which aspects of your type most often cause relationship problems between you and others?
  • How have your personality type preferences influenced your life and career?

Often conflicts between the person being coached and the people in their life comes from differences in preferences. Lead the person through the descriptions of all of the preferences on Side 1 of the Wheel: E-I, S-N, T-F, and J-P. Assist them in choosing the four-letter type of the person with which they are experiencing conflict from Side 1 of the Wheel.

Profile Sheets ? 16 Personality Types

Have the person choose their Profile Sheet and the Profile Sheet of the person with whom they are experiencing conflict from the package. Compare the individual descriptions in each of the categories and answer the following three questions on Side 2 of the Profile Sheet:

In what areas are you similar to this person?
In what areas are you different from this person?
In what areas can you improve your relations with this person?

When going through this exercise, the person is then able to step back and realize that behaviors are most often the result of each other?s inborn, personality type.

Use the following questions to guide discussion around areas they might need to address:

  • What contributions do you bring to the relationship?
  • Which of your habits might be irritating to the other?
  • What do you find valuable about each other?
  • What does the other do that bothers you?
  • What do you hope to achieve in resolving this conflict?

Step 3: Evaluate Individual Needs
Assist the person being coached in evaluating their needs through discussion of a series of questions:

  • What are some of your behaviors that seem to get in the way of having effective relationships with others?
  • What talents do you have that are especially helpful to others?
  • How would your spouse, boss, colleagues, or close friends briefly describe you?
  • What do you care most about in your life? What concerns you most?
  • What do you feel proud of and what concerns you about the way people at work treat one another?
  • What inspires or motivates you?
  • What kind of appreciation/recognition do you prefer? From whom? Under what circumstances?
  • What kind of criticism do you prefer? From whom? Under what circumstances?
  • Which work tasks do you pass on to others, ignore, or never get around to doing?
  • Tell me about a recent change you?ve experienced. How did you react? How did you cope with it?
  • Describe how you handle change.
  • What are your thoughts about conflict? What do you do to resolve it? How effective have your efforts been? Why?
  • Are there any questions I have not asked that we should discuss?

Step 4: Assess Skills and Interests
Lead the person through a discussion of the following four questions:

  • Things I like and do well
  • Things I don?t like but do well
  • Things I like but find difficult to do
  • Things I don?t like and struggle to do

Focus your discussion on things the person likes and does well. Those things the person doesn?t like and struggles with doing, identify as areas for coaching. Assist the person in developing ways to handle those things they don?t like and struggle with.

Step 5: Develop Your Action Plan
The key to successful coaching is identification of objectives, steps that will be taken, timelines and the desired results. To achieve this:

  • Have the person identify someone they trust that can help them practice the coaching suggestions
  • Develop specific action items and timelines. Establish accountability?such as how will the person know when they have reached a goal?
  • Encourage the person being coached to practice the behaviors in coaching sessions and then in ?real time.?
  • Suggest the person keep a journal where they record behaviors practiced and the results?who, what, when, and where. Discuss the results of the experiences practiced in the next coaching session.
  • Share personal insights about your own type and your potential interactions with other types as it relates to strengths and differences. Encourage person being coached to give details about how process is moving forward toward identified goals, needs and wants, and be clear about what is working.

Using Type in Selling - Part 2

Monday, September 24th, 2012

How does type actually work in the selling process?

There are stages in the process of moving a sale forward. Time is spent ?Initiating the rapport.? This consists of greeting the customer and establishing a basis for moving ahead. Next the salesperson ?investigates needs.? This is when listeningis especially important. Next, a ?course of action? may be suggested using the information gathered in the listening stage. And, the final stage is reaching an agreement on the next action, or ?closing? the sale. You can see all aspects of the type preferences coming forth throughout the sales interaction. Specific aspects of type, however, stand out as more important than others at various stages.???

Personality Type Assessment Wheel

Nonverbal behavior cues such as pacing, timing, body position, and movement are associated with the ENERGY-Extraversion-Introversion preference. Customers can use these cues to decide quickly as to whether or not they will be comfortable in dealing with that person. For this reason, the Extraversion-Introversion preference is important during the beginning stage of ?initiating.????????

The INFORMATION gathering phase?Sensing and Intuition?and the DECISION phase?Thinking and Feeling?intersect during the ?investigating needs? stage and ?suggesting a course of action.? A customer that is making a decision to purchase is definitely involved in taking in information and using that information to make a decision. Various types prefer to gather data and make decisions in different and predictable ways. It is not unusual that the functional pairs?ST, SF, NF, NT?have the greatest impact in this part of the sales process.

The ACTION stage?Judging and Perceiving preference, of course, has the greatest effect on closing the sale. This can become more apparent as the selling relationship is focused on obtaining agreement and closing.

The two middle letters?the functional pairs?express how customers function during sales interactions. The following table summarizes the focus of each customer type, what they value, and what to remember when dealing with them.

????????????????????? Customer Type Modes

ST CUSTOMER??

Focuses on:?The specifics/The Logical Implications of these specifics?

Values:? Acting responsibly/working with a sales person who acts responsibly

Remember:? State the FACTS

SF CUSTOMER???

Focuses on:? The specifics/The impact of these specifics on people

Values:? Personal loyalty/Working with a salesperson who personalizes & individualizes service???

Remember:? Give PERSONAL SERVICE???

NF CUSTOMER??

Focuses on:? The general concept or big picture (not specifics)/ How the big picture impacts people or supports their values

Values:? Making a difference (in the community, for the family, in the world)/ Working with a salesperson who helps to make his or her vision become a reality

Remember:? Support the customer?s VISION

NT CUSTOMER???

Focuses on:? The general concept or big picture (not specifics)/ How the big picture possibilities create logical options

Values:? Having options that fit his or her needs now and in the future/ Working with a?salesperson who demonstrates competence

Remember:? Provide and support LOGICAL OPTIONS

Practice presenting your product/service from each of the four basic positions so you can shift when necessary. In an actual sales situation, watch your customer?s nonverbal cues such as:

  • Changing facial expression
  • Movement away from you
  • Appearance of detachment
  • Irritation in her or his voice

These cues signal a need to listen more carefully and possibly choose a different approach. A good rule or standard is that unless the information is coming across to the customer in his or her ?language,? probably the customer will miss at least part of your message and will feel less comfortable about the interaction.

Finally, be aware that using type in selling is a discipline and takes practice. As you begin using the type framework, you will have immediate payoff in terms of more understanding and control in the selling situation. As you continue to work with it, you gain fluidity, ease, and an even greater appreciation of your customers, their needs, and their diversity.

Adapted from FLEX Selling by Susan Brock

Servant Leadership

Tuesday, August 28th, 2012

Summary of article, ?Is Servant Leadership the Answer to the Recession???

A few weeks ago, I told a client that the difference between their firm and a closely related ?sister? firm they are associated with, is humility. ?Your firm?s leadership has humility and has truly put it to practice in their interaction with their clients and employees.? What is the definition of humility? Webster?s Unabridged Dictionary lists descriptive words such as, absence of pride, having or showing a consciousness of one?s shortcomings, unpretentious. When I shared my opinion my own definition was, ?not being a know-it-all, teachable, and approachable.????????????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????

Imagine my elation when a few days later I received this article conducted with Ken

The PEOPLE Process Trainer’s Manual & Participant’s Package

Blanchard, the One Minute Manager himself, and who truly put ?Leadership Training? on the map, by Training Zone about ?Servant Leadership? requiring humility. Humility is such a powerful, important quality, and no one expresses its power in leadership qualities better than Ken Blanchard. Therefore, I?d like to share portions of his interview with you.

What does this have to do with personality-type? Servant leaders learn as much as they can about the people they supervise. They get to know, trust and love them. One of the best ways to do this is by understanding the strengths of their employees. And, that understanding is easily achieved by learning about the four-letter personality type of the people we work with. As you read this article, please note that servant leaders help people win through teaching and coaching them to do their best. Knowledge of personality type theory gives you the skills to be able to teach and coach people to do their best.

****************************

?Servant leaders?are humble people who don?t think less of themselves, they just think about themselves less. They don?t deny their power, they just realize it passes through them, not from them.? (Ken Blanchard-www.kenblanchard.com)

The idea that leaders and managers must serve their people if they are to create highly successful organizations is not new. Ken Blanchard ? a high profile supporter of the servant leadership concept ? explains why leading with humility could be the key to surviving and thriving during the current economic crisis. If you want to survive and thrive during this crisis, you need to first make sure you are a servant leader. In tough times and in good times, the first question you need to ask yourself is why are you leading? Are you here to serve, or be served?

Servant leadership was first introduced by Bob Greenleaf in the 1960?s, at that time, a top executive with telecommunications giant AT&T. Although it is now far more accepted as an effective management principle, the idea that leaders and managers must serve their people if they were to create highly successful organizations was entirely new at that time. Servant leadership flew in the face of traditional management practice which concerned itself with directing, controlling, and supervising employees? activities ? of playing the role of judge, critic and evaluator of their efforts.

Mr. Blanchard emphasizes that in a shrinking economy, this kind of hierarchical leadership is even less effective. ?The last thing we need to develop are still more organizations where colleagues spend most of their time trying to please the boss rather than accomplish the organization?s goals and visions; where people try to protect themselves rather than to help move the organization in its desired direction; where people get promoted only on their upward influencing skills and not their actual achievements. It is precisely these kind of organizational cultures that have got us into this mess, cultures where a ?what?s in it for me?? mentality has prevailed, and where longer term ethical considerations have been sacrificed at the altar of short-term greed and the exploitation of the less fortunate. This downturn should be a wakeup call for each and every leader and manager. There is no better time to start grounding ourselves in humility, no better time to start thinking about how we can make a real difference on this planet and focus on the common good. Now is the time to become a servant leader.?

The qualities of a servant leader

Servant leaders don?t fear losing face by making ethical as well as purely financed-based decisions, or fail to recognize and promote talent at a ?lower? level in case they later find their positions threatened. On the contrary, they are confident and skilled enough to set powerful visions, build up people at the frontline and put more power into their hands, so they can really make a difference to the customer experience and help get business booming from the bottom up. They are ?humble? people who don?t think less of themselves, they just think about themselves less. They don?t deny their power, they just realize it passes through them, not from them.

Servant leaders seek to help people win through teaching and coaching them to do their best. They listen to their people, praise them, support them, and redirect them when they deviate from their goals. They find out what their people need to be successful. Rather than focusing on self-interest, on what will please them, servant leaders are interested in making a difference in the lives of their people and, in the process, impacting the organization for the better.

Sadly, too many top managers still think leading in this way will lead to mutiny. Instead of becoming successful servant leaders they become the opposite; they become self-serving leaders, who ultimately set themselves and their organizations up for failure because of their destructive influence. Servant leaders avoid this destructive influence by turning the traditional hierarchical pyramid upside-down in their organizations. This inspires and excites people to live according to their organization?s vision, because when they see leaders taking on coaching roles to build self-esteem, encouraging individual growth and giving people the tools they need to deliver that vision, people are more motivated, more responsible, and far more loyal. Everyone wins.

Becoming a servant leader

Ask yourself: ?What is my self-worth based on?? Self-serving leaders base their self-worth on how much money they make, the recognition they get for their work, and their power and status. And while there is nothing wrong with making good money, and with getting power and status and recognition as a result of what you do, you?re in trouble if you confuse those things with who you really are, because then you are always going to need more and more of them.

Servant leadership is about recognizing that you are someone who needs to let go of your ego, and recognize that you are entitled to self-esteem irrespective of your salary or status. It is about getting up 45 minutes earlier, so you can take time to get in touch with who you are and what kind of person you want to be. Then you?ll have a better chance of living that vision that day. It is about developing the habit of getting a small group of people to be honest with you, and allowing them to tell you when you?re being stupid, just in case.

Finally, servant leadership is about having the courage to let your people bring their brains to work and giving them the power to help deliver your organization?s vision and values. Catch them doing things right and praise them. And remember that profit is the applause you get for taking care of your people, taking care of your customers and doing a great job.

Communications and Personality Type - Judging & Perceiving

Wednesday, August 8th, 2012

The fourth behavior dimension?how we take Action?Judging or Perceiving is vital to understand about one another because it is related to how we like to organize our world. Judging types prefer to decide and Perceiving types prefer to explore options. Judging types feel tension until they make a decision and Perceiving types feel tensionwhen they feel ?pushed? into make a decision too quickly.???

The PEOPLE Process Trainer's Manual & Participant's Package

Communication difficulties are created between Judging and Perceiving types around the time frame for completing a project. Perceiving types often start tasks at the last minute because they are intent on gathering as much data as possible that may impact their decision and Judging types are likely to complete tasks ahead of time. Because the Judging types are focused on the deadline, they find it difficult to trust that the Perceiving types will meet the deadline.

Judging types like to plan and organize their work in a systematic manner. They rely on this structure to be able to have a feeling of accomplishment and moving forward. Perceiving types approach a project by starting at one point and making decisions along the way as they find out information and move forward. Stress can be created when Judging and Perceiving types work together unless they understand each other?s preferred style. A knowledge of the strengths of Judging types and Perceiving types can eliminate a lot of miscommunication.

Judging Types in communication

Strengths ? ?Just do it!?

  • Are decisive
  • Share info and move forward
  • Well organized & efficient communicators
  • Provide timelines

Communication Approach:

  • Quickly make decisions, provide closure
  • Punctual & expect others to be on time
  • Like structure and schedule
  • Like to have control

When Communicating with Judgers:

  • Decide as quickly as possible
  • Focus on what is most important
  • Narrow & focus your options before sharing
  • Create & share timelines

Perceiving Types in communication

Strengths ? ?Have we researched this enough??

  • Flexible & adaptable
  • Open to new information
  • Create & consider lots of options
  • Easygoing approach to change

Communication Approach:

  • Include lots of data in decision-making
  • Spontaneous communication style
  • Can postpone decisions
  • See opportunity in interruptions

When Communicating with Perceivers:

  • Allow discussion time & plan for changes
  • Establish mutual deadlines
  • Seek more information before deciding
  • Be open to communication opportunities

Communications and Personality Type — Extravert & Introvert

Tuesday, June 19th, 2012

Communication is central to our life?we communicate with others every day, throughout the day. Understanding, appreciating, and accommodating personality differences in communication style can bring major success to our effectiveness as a friend, spouse, employee, supervisor, trainer, leader, and team member. People have different preferences in the way they take in and evaluate information and their orientation to the world around them. As we develop our awareness, understanding, and appreciation of communication differences, we will reap the benefit in our relationship with others.?

Extraverts are energized by lively and enthusiastic discussions, with rapid-paced conversation, and often interrupt as they elaborate on and process thoughts. Introverts are energized by quiet conversations with space for reflection and conversation pace is slower, taking time as they build thoughts and ideas internally. Extraverts? communication approach doesn?t allow time for Introverts to reflect and then give their opinions. Extraverts like to ?think out loud? and don?t realize that Introverts feel unable to respond quickly in a conversation, preferring to internalize the information first. Thus, the Extraverts? reaction sometimes is that the Introvert is not providing input that energizes the Extravert.

When Introverts share information, it has been carefully thought through and evaluated. When an Extravert is in the ?thinking out loud? mode they may not give the input the full evaluation it merits. Similarly, Introverts may put too much emphasis on what is said by Extraverts, not realizing they are ?hearing themselves think? and need to process information this way. This can cause difficulties for both preferences as Extraverts may miss valuable contributions by Introverts, and Introverts may take what Extraverts say too seriously and make decisions based on the input.

These communication differences can be especially dangerous in conflict situations, as Extraverts want to handle a situation immediately and Introverts require time to think things through before giving their ideas on possible solutions. Because each preference is requiring something the other type does not prefer, tension can increase. Extraverts can become impatient, wanting to move forward and make a decision not giving time to the Introverts? need to process the information internally and, then, make a decision.

EXTRAVERTS? in communication

Strengths

  • Energetic & enthusiastic
  • Think out loud
  • Give a lot of information
  • Network well

Communication Approach:

  • Speak out freely in groups
  • Think out loud
  • Like to discuss lots of topics
  • Interrupt often during discussion

When Communicating with Extraverts:

  • Listen attentively
  • Be actively responsive
  • Be energetic & enthusiastic
  • Support their need to communicate

INTROVERTS ?in communication

Strengths:

  • Quiet, reflective presence
  • Respond carefully and thoughtfully
  • Know a few people well
  • Listen without interrupting

Communication Approach:

  • Listen more than talk
  • Talk one on one
  • Need time to reflect before responding
  • Process information internally

When Communicating with Introverts:

  • Value their need for privacy
  • Allow them time to change focus
  • Ask questions to draw them out
  • Don?t pressure for an instant response

Judging Listening Strengths

Monday, May 7th, 2012

?I just have to make good listening my goal.?

When I asked the question, ?What are your strengths as a listener??? no one mentioned anything related to Judging.? It seems that Js don?t get much help from their Judging when it comes to listening, and that Judging tendencies are just something they have to manage.

That made me think about my own Judging function.? Is it really a deficit when it comes to being a good listener?? It?s such an asset in so many other ways.? It helps me keep my life organized and take care of others.? It helps me set goals and work steadily toward them, making it possible to do just about anything I want to do, like go on a trip to Europe with my family, finish writing a book or even learn how to use the espresso machine I got for Christmas.?????

?Wait!? If my J allows me to be good at reaching goals, maybe that?s what can help me be a better listener.? I just have to make good listening my goal.? Or, I can change the goals I used to have into good listening goals.? Instead of the goal to ?Give my opinion? why not have the goal, ?See it from their point of view.?? Instead of the goal to ?Solve their problem? why not have the goal, ?Let them know you understand their problem.?

Js like to make ?to-do? lists, so why don?t I make a ?to-do? list about listening, of all the techniques that have come up in these issues.? Then, after I?ve followed all the points on the list, I can have the satisfaction of checking off one more conversation where I?ve accomplished my goal of being a good listener.? I can feel proud of one more time where I really opened myself up to another person, and let them know that they are not alone in this life.? someday I may even meet my ultimate goal, which is to do those things on my list so naturally that I?m not even thinking about them.

So we Js do have a strength when it comes to listening.? If we put ?Be a good listener? on our ?to-do? list, if we make it our goal, well then, we?ll probably pull it off.

 

Perceiving Listening Strengths

Monday, April 23rd, 2012

?I really want to know more about what people have to say.?

The attitudes we?re looking for in a listener:? open-mindedness, curiosity and tolerance, seem to come easily to many Ps.? You can see it in their faces.? They have that ?I?m interested? look in their eyes, and it?s fun to talk to someone who looks like that.?

The PEOPLE Process Type Wheel

I can think of many times where I?ve watched people just open up to a P, and suddenly start talking happily about their interests.

?I like to listen because I?m collecting data,? says John, ENTP.? ?Once, a friend told me a long story, and after he finished I said:? ?That?s interesting.?? He said:? ?When most people say that, it?s dismissive, but when you say it, you?re actually finding it interesting.???

?I like to listen because I?m collecting data,? says John, ENTP.? ?Once, a friend told me a long story, and after he finished I said:? ?That?s interesting.?? He said:? ?When most people say that, it?s dismissive, but when you say it, you?re actually finding it interesting.?

?My strength as a listener is that I really want to know more about what people have to say,? says Anna, ISFP.? ?I know?it?s important to them, but I also like to learn from other people.? When I was young, it was a good way for me to be, because I had to go to parties with a whole bunch of my husband?s business associates, who would all be talking about science.? The easiest way for me to mingle would be to ask questions.? I realized that wow, this is exciting.? I could talk to people that I didn?t know, and there were all these other topics in the world that I didn?t really know about.? Also, when I took the time to listen to other people, I got a lot of information that I could really use in my life.?

Because Ps?are so good at data collection, they can gently push the speakers to consider new and sometimes surprising information.

?I can pick out what was not said, what was underrepresented,? says Caroline, INFP.? ?That?s not easy to do, because a lot of time in discussions, everyone starts following along with evidence in one direction and they totally miss that there might be an entirely different viewpoint.?

Instead of opinions or advice, which send the message that the listener was really listening to themselves, most Ps tend to naturally respond with questions, which sends the message that they are really listening and trying to understand.? Another way of sending the message that we?re listening is to repeat back what the speaker said, in our own words, to make sure we are interpreting it correctly.? One P even told us that this practice of ?active listening,? came naturally to him, and was his habit before he had ever heard it described.

?When I first heard about active listening, I thought, ?So that?s what you call it,?? says Jerry, INTP.? ?I did that naturally.? People always seem to find it easy to talk to me, because I put what they said into my own words.? For example, my wife works in a very stressful job as a nurse in an infant intensive care unit.? If I ask her how her day was, and she says, ?It was awful,? I don?t just grunt.? I really do try to understand as she describes the problems she had with a parent today.? When she?s finished, I might say, ?I know it frustrates you when you try to tell a parent that what they want isn?t good for their baby.?? It turns out not?to be a very long conversation, because when people feel understood, the need to tell their story over and over is not so great.

?I worked as a marriage counselor,? he continues,? and some part of every couple?s problem was the failure to communicate.? I taught them to put into their own words what they thought the other was saying.? I told them not to just parrot their words, or you?ll get a response like, ?Don?t do that listening stuff on me.? But if it?s in your own words, it sounds natural, and they?ll be able to tell you if you?re right or wrong.?